An artist … a mother … a friend … an inspiration to all who knew her …
Sandy was very excited about joining Natural Touch Canada. She had been painting
and creating in every medium imaginable for much of her life, and she was about to
embark on selling her art through Natural Touch Canada. As plans were underway, she
fell ill.
Diagnosis: Leukemia.
For the next two years, Sandy was in and out of the hospital as she underwent rounds
of chemotherapy … yet through it all, she continued to work with her hands to create
the most beautiful things.
Only two weeks left to live. That’s what the Doctor told Sandy. She was only 44 years old.
She looked good and was up and about. She said she wanted to see everybody she knew, so
the word went out and there was non-stop traffic through her home in that two-week period.
She had so many friends.
We gathered around Sandy while she explained that she was at peace with her prognosis; she
felt she was needed on the other side – that there was a purpose for what was happening.
As we listened to her talk in those two short weeks, we were filled with awe at her words
and her amazing grace. In what should have been a time of great sadness, instead she made
us feel enlightened and joyful. She simply had a profound affect on people.
Two weeks passed and she could stand the pain no more. The homecare nurse hooked her up
to a morphine pump. She was surrounded by her family and four women. Four women who barely
knew one another but had one thing in common: we all loved Sandy. She was our best friend.
We were her “circle of friends”. That’s what she called us. On her last night with us, we
circled around her bed all night long and talked. As she drifted in and out of a drugged sleep,
she told us not to whisper. She said she could hear us and found it comforting. We joked
and laughed … and she smiled. She was not in pain and her smile brought joy, so the atmosphere was good.
Often she would appear to be sleeping, but suddenly she would open her eyes and stare at us
for a moment as though she were surprised. We knew that she was slipping in and out. She
told us that she was catching glimpses of another place and there were two people waiting for her.
At 7:30 that morning (Tuesday, April 29th, 2003), her son came home after working the night
shift … and the entire mood shifted. He took one look at his mother, climbed in bed beside
her, held onto her and wept. We spent the rest of the morning struggling to keep our emotions
in check as we tried to comfort one another.
There were many, many people in the house that day, but it was her family and her “circle of
friends” that cared for her. The others stood back and watched with anguish in their eyes.
At one point Sandy was completely lucid, and she told us that she loved us – we lost control
of our emotions as she spoke those words. She comforted us in typical Sandy style - that was her way.
Her last hour was haunting. As she struggled to breath, we stood helplessly watching and
weeping – there was nothing we could do to help her. At 2:45 p.m. Sandy took her last breath
surrounded by her family and her “circle of friends”.
Afterwards, we went out in the backyard – the sun was shining - not a cloud in the sky; we
sat on the grass and clung to each other and cried and cried and cried uncontrollably for
what seemed like forever. We cried for our deep loss … not for Sandy … because we knew with
certainty that she was in a better place - a place where she was not in pain.
The profound experience of caring for Sandy in her last hours created an extraordinary bond
between her “circle of friends”. Four women who barely knew one another were suddenly best
friends. Perhaps in the grand scheme, that was Sandy’s plan for us. We had each other to
lean on as we grieved the loss of our friend. Sandy made sure of that.
Sandy wanted one thing. And that was for us to celebrate her life. Each year, we gather on
the anniversary of her passing, and we celebrate the profound difference this extraordinary
woman made to the world during her short lifetime. It is with soulful joy and love that we
celebrate and honour Sandra M. Porter.
A portion of the profits from Natural Touch Canada are donated to cancer care and research
in memory of Sandra M. Porter.
Written by Linda Peers
Proud member of Sandy’s “circle of friends”
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